Weird dreams and a confidence I don’t trust (Day 3)

No night sweats last night, but a handful of odd dreams including being on top of Mt. Everest where there was a brick visitor’s centre built up. I wondered in my dream about the people who hauled those bricks up. It occurs to me just now that maybe Mt. Everest represents sobriety and the visitor’s centre represents the painstaking work of so many sober writers and speakers who have traveled this trail before me. Thanks, sherpas who have trodden this path already! 😀

I was listening to an early Annie Grace podcast this morning where she was interviewing Catherine Gray (who wrote The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober – halfway through and LOOOOVE it). Annie asked Cath if anything felt different about the time her sobriety actually started to stick. Cath said something along the lines of “this time, I took it seriously and treated it like a job. I did the work. I read the blogs. I listened to the podcasts. I learned about addiction. I worked at it.”

It was such nice confirmation of my thoughts yesterday that if this is going to go somewhere for me this time, I need to treat it seriously, especially the first 100 days. I committed to 100 because it felt doable but I really really hope that by 100 I will be thoroughly convinced that booze has no place in my life.

It’s Day 3, and I’ve been here before, and I hesitate to say this feels different (because I’ve said that before too). That’s the part I don’t trust. I don’t want to get comfortable because by Day 3 I’m barely past the trailhead map, barely out of my own driveway, just pushed off the dock (pick your metaphor).

The only difference, like Cath, is that I’m really working at it this time. I’m actively seeking out other sober bloggers on here and staying immersed. I’m reading my Quit Lit. I’m rehearsing scenarios ahead of time and planning what to have on hand to drink. I’m aware, and working.

Day 3 pluses so far:
– woke up less groggy than I have in many days
– I found I had random energy for little tasks that have been bugging me (switching out the recycle bin, for example)
– went on a shopping mission to our local town for a non-standard battery and it was soooo nice to not spend a single second wondering about where to stop for wine and how many to buy so it wouldn’t look like a massive bill on the visa and I wouldn’t be hauling in a case worth in front of my husband and kids
– ran into a friend we only really in the summer and remembered that he and his wife don’t really drink, but yet we always have a great time spending summer days together

Please tag your favorite sober bloggers and help me find more people to read! This part of the journey is a lot of fun for me and I love to read what everyone else is up to at various stages of the game.

14 thoughts on “Weird dreams and a confidence I don’t trust (Day 3)

  1. You’re reading. Excellent. Allan Carr’s book was great for me because it allowed me to twist the mindset and focus on the positives of soberness-ish-ly. 🙂
    Check out my Library page. I list books, films, YouTube if you want more inspiration. Most are about being sober but some are about lifestyle.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Here’s just some of the Great Super Hero’s I follow:

    Claire, Ditching the Wine

    Collette, Wine to water

    Elizabeth, Without the wine

    GettingSoberGal, Just a gal trying to get sober

    Jackie, morrisfamily2222

    Jim, Life beyond booze

    Limetwiste, Moderately Sober

    Lisa Marie, I love my new life!

    Lovie Price, Wake Up!

    Msnewleaf, my life without alcohol

    Nadine, The Sobriety Tree

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Hey. Catherine Gray’s book was the reason I gave up drinking. She persuaded me to try it and thank God I stumbled across it. If you look at the bloggers who generally comment on my posts, they are the ones to take a look at. I read Jason Vales ok but didn’t agree with it entirely. The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley is a good read.
    You are doing an awesome job and are in a great place with a great attitude. Well done. X

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Loved Sober Diaries! And had been wondering about the Jason Vale one but it sounded similar to both Annie Grace and Allen Carr and I feel pretty familiar with the argument that we need to change the belief that booze has any benefits for us (I mostly agree – but would argue that sometimes I WANT to be sedated vs relaxed!). Have you read Blackout or Drinking: A Love Affair?

      Liked by 2 people

      1. No ..l neither of those? Are they worth a read? I found Jason Vale and Annie Grace interesting but don’t agree that everyone has the same capacity to be addicted to alcohol and theta everyone who drinks is being controlled by the need for it in some way. I think there are people who really are not bothered by it and can take it or leave it. Then there are those of us who, sadly perhaps, have no ability to do that. It’s all or nothing. I don’t think everyone is in the road to alcohol addiction.


      2. I haven’t read either and am wondering if they’re worth a read too! 😀 And yeah, agreed that some people just don’t seem to ever struggle the way I do (or they don’t talk about it!).

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I suspect many do struggle and don’t talk about it but I know people who really don’t have the interest in it. They drink occasionally, enjoy it but then won’t touch it again for weeks. I can’t get my head around that!! 😂

        Liked by 1 person

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